


Six Years is Too Long

by ImWithEnjolras



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, luv u madi, madi told me to write it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-26
Updated: 2015-03-26
Packaged: 2018-03-19 19:41:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3621888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImWithEnjolras/pseuds/ImWithEnjolras
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Have you ever been in love, Tanaka?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Six Years is Too Long

**Author's Note:**

> This is supposed to be for the first day of Haikyuu!! rarepair week...but, as usual, I am late lol. The prompt was beginnings/celebration...summer festivals are a celebration, right? Love you all! Please enjoy!

"Have you ever been in love, Tanaka?"

They're at Miyagi's summer festival. They were supposed to go with the rest of the old team, but something came up for almost everyone so now it's just Tanaka and Asahi meandering around. Tanaka feels his chest constrict at Asahi's question.

_Don't tell him, don't tell him, don't tell him._

"I don't know." Asahi looks at him surprised. Asahi had always pegged Tanaka as a guy who had some experience with the feeling of falling and being in love. He tries to catch the boy's eye, but Tanaka's doing a stellar job avoiding his gaze. "I'm not good at that stuff."

_But I'm lying._

Tanaka fixes his stare on the festivities going on around them. Asahi looks fantastic in his yukata and when Tanaka first laid eyes on him today, he forgot how to breathe. He can hardly tear his eyes off of the older boy. Even now his eyes dart over to how the purple in the yukata plays off of Asahi's skintone. (And if Tanaka suddenly feels a little too hot when the yukata opens just enough to flash the lean, dusky planes of Asahi's chest...well, that's entirely on Tanaka.)

Asahi's gaze flows over the ex-wing spiker. Tanaka may not be in a yukata for this festival, but that doesn't mean he's dressed sloppily. Tanaka looks ridiculously good. Don't get Asahi wrong; he's known since the beginning of high school that Tanaka has always had an incredible fashion sense. The few times he's seen Tanaka out of school and volleyball uniforms, Tanaka had always dressed well. He doesn’t know how Tanaka does it, but there's something in the way the maroon shirt he's wearing stretches across his chest that makes Asahi worry his lip between his teeth.

"Let's go over there." Tanaka tilts his head to the side, gesturing to the top of a hill. "I bet the view of the fireworks there's sick!"

He's not as boisterous like before, Asahi thinks, finding Tanaka somewhat more withdrawn. He walks behind the younger boy -  _man_ , Asahi reprimands quietly,  _we're not kids any more_. It's been about three years since Tanaka and the rest of the second years graduated. But even so, Asahi still can't shake off his senpai mindset and viewing Tanaka as that unleashed boy with limitless energy from high school.

 _What happened after we graduated?_  Out of all his kouhai, Tanaka had changed the most. He's become subdued and Asahi doesn't know if he should worry. But then Tanaka turns and that wide, almost shark-like grin reflects back at him and Asahi toys with the possibility that maybe Tanaka's just matured too fast for him.

The muscles in Tanaka's back shift smoothly under his shirt, a stark reminder that the Tanaka in front of him is definitely no longer a boy.  _Isn't it a bit tight?_  Asahi resists frantically waving the plastic fan in his hand. Tanaka pauses and waits for Asahi to line up beside him before continuing.

"That's weird...walk beside me..." Asahi barely catches Tanaka's muttering, but when what the younger man says registers in his brain, it's got him blushing. But he continues with his train of thought on Tanaka.

He's bulked out a bit, Asahi's mind wandering - yet again - on how the shirt fits his friend a little too well and how the sleeves are tight along Tanaka's biceps. The ex-wing spiker stretches a little and the shirt lifts in the front, revealing well-defined abdominal muscles and a dark trail of hair leading to places Asahi would prefer thinking about in the privacy of his apartment. He shakes his head just to get his thoughts elsewhere, his hair - _I really need a haircut_ \- brushes his collarbones.

He peers at Tanaka through his hair and the shorter man looks as if he's deeply thinking about something.  _Was it my question earlier?_  His free hand clenches at his side and Asahi figures that the pang in his heart comes from him imagining Tanaka with - in love with, holding hands with, laughing with, kissing - someone who was definitely not him. And that hurts a little more than he'd like.

 _I sure know how to pick them_. Asahi ignores the tears prickling at the corners of his eyes.  _No use in crying over something you've never talked about._ He's liked Tanaka since the boy literally tumbled into volleyball try-outs in his first year, but he's been in love with his old kouhai since Tanaka's second year. Asahi isn't too sure when he stopped seeing Tanaka as just a kouhai - just a friend - and started seeing him as the boy he was in love with. Maybe it was his dedication, how when everyone left -  _even me_ , Asahi remembers guiltily - he stuck through it all. He can hardly imagine how Tanaka felt at that time. He can't imagine seeing his team crumble around him and how the two strongholds in Tanaka's life left him without a word.

"Stop thinking about that." Asahi's head jolts to Tanaka, who's looking at him with a fire in his eyes. "I've long forgiven you for that."

"How did you--" Tanaka looks at him directly.

"I know that look." Tanaka's eyebrows furrow. "Please, you're too important to me to dwell in the past." He puts a hand on Asahi's back and steers them forward and Asahi feels something lift from his shoulders that he didn't know was there. The weight and warmth of Tanaka's hand on his back is comforting and stabilizing.

_Do I love you for this too?_

Tanaka naturally stands on the side of Asahi that traffic runs by. He creates a separation between Asahi and the people walking in the opposite direction. He makes sure it's his shoulder that is bumped and his side that is accidently prodded and poked by elbows and bags and excited children. Tanaka can feel his hand get clammy on Asahi's back, but he can't help but touch his ex-senpai. _I'm greedy and selfish and let me just have this_.

He's loved Asahi for long enough. From the second he tripped into the gym - he swears it's because he was too excited, but Tanaka knows it's because his breath caught in his throat at the sight of Azumane Asahi and suddenly everything around him melted into a singular plane - to this moment, he still loves Asahi. It's been a long time since he's thought about that dark time in his memory, when he overcompensated with the loss of his senpai and the boy he loved, when his best friend left him. He doesn't like thinking about it. He'd come to terms with it; it was hard but they'd gotten past it. And he did forgive them - a long, long time ago. Partly because he'd always known they would come back, but also because his love for Asahi wouldn't let him hold it against the Karasuno Ace.

He restrains himself from tracing circles into the small of Asahi's back. They climb the stairs side-by-side and when they reach the peak, they are alone as the sun sets in front of them. It's almost time for the fireworks.

As soon as Tanaka takes his hand from his back, Asahi misses it. He finds himself leaning towards Tanaka, reaching for that warmth again. The glow of the gold-red sun reflects on Tanaka's tan skin and Asahi thinks he looks like he's made of gold. The serious set of Tanaka's brow is smoothed away and Asahi wants to know what's going on in the man's head.  _What's getting him so relaxed? What's he thinking about that calms him down like this?_

Tanaka finds himself thinking of Asahi's question - again, because this is definitely not the only time today he's thought about it.  _I've been in love for so long, I don't know what it's like to not be in love with you, Azumane Asahi._

Just the mere thought of Asahi fills Tanaka with a tingly warmth. It spreads from his chest, travelling through his body, reaching the farthest extremities. His fingers twitch and he nearly lifts his hand to card his fingers through Asahi's sun-stained hair.

Asahi can't take his eyes off of Tanaka, but eventually the sun sets completely and the first of the fireworks flash through the dark, night sky. He tears his gaze away and he gazes with wonder at the bursting red, green, gold, pink, blue, white blooms in the sky. He knows the physics of this; he knows the theory, he knows the mechanics. But even so, seeing it - experiencing it - is something completely different.

"I've never seen anything quite as beautiful as the Tanabata fireworks." Asahi breathes out, and it's a wonder that Tanaka even hears him over the loud cracks of the fireworks.

But it's an even greater wonder that he heard Tanaka.

"I have." His gaze snaps to Tanaka, and in true Tanaka fashion, the younger man stares at Asahi unwaveringly. He has an intense look in his eyes that makes his heart race. Somehow, Asahi knows that Tanaka isn't talking about fireworks - he knows the younger man hasn't stopped looking at him.

_I can't...I can't have imagined that._

"What--"

"I'm tired, Asahi." Asahi shivers as Tanaka says his name without a suffix. "Tired of being with you but not being _with_ you. And if this destroys our friendship, so be it. I'm tired of being silent. Six years is too long."

The fireworks continue exploding overhead and the colours reflect onto them.

"I lied. Earlier, I mean." Tanaka's fingers tap on his thigh. "I've been in love. Once. And still am." He lifts one hand, tucking strands of Asahi's hair behind his ear. "You. It's always been you. I love you."

Asahi's stunned to silence. Tanaka turns away as if he hasn't bared his heart to Asahi. As if he hasn't confessed something so earth-shatteringly beautiful. Asahi's ears ring and his heartbeat thuds in his eardrums.

"Tana-- Ryuunosuke." Asahi reaches out, the boldest thing he's ever done his whole life. He hooks two fingers through the belt loops of Tanaka's beige pants, the other hand cupping the shorter man's cheek. He has no words, he can hardly articulate, so he pulls Tanaka up, slanting his lips over Tanaka's.

He kisses Tanaka with everything he's got, his chest constricting and shivers running through his body. The hand on Tanaka's belt loops, smooths itself over Tanaka's back, finally feeling the muscles rippling under that goddamn maroon t-shirt.

Tanaka's frozen at first, but it finally hits him that Asahi - the Asahi he's been in love with for six years, the Asahi he was once sure didn't love him back - is kissing him with a passion he's never felt before. His hands shake, fingers feeling ice cold. Asahi pulls back momentarily, taking a gasping breath, before leaning back in and Tanaka  buries his hands into Asahi's hair. He whimpers and the sound travels through Asahi. He pulls Tanaka harder against him, actions confessing what he can't with words.

When they finally pull back, Asahi presses his forehead to Tanaka's.

"I can't even tell you-- never in my wildest dreams..." Asahi sighs, hot breath brushing against Tanaka's lips. He can barely form sentences. "I love you. I should have told you earlier."

Tanaka shakes his head gently, happier than he's ever been. In a moment his entire world has shifted for the better and he's never been more excited.

"We're starting something better, you know?" Asahi smiles, gently pressing his lips to Tanaka's again.

"I can't wait." Tanaka strokes his thumbs along Asahi's jawline. A wide grin overtakes his features.

The fireworks burst above them and they're bathed in bright colours.

_Happy Tanabata._

**Author's Note:**

> Leave me a comment, if you'd like! :)


End file.
